Though I feel I have been away for so long, I really have not been. I am returning with a vengance however, unleashing upon the world (lol) my first college essay. As I am a civil engineering major, I have only had to take two semesters of english yet I have always enjoyed writing. Luckily my English classes were taught by a very dynamic professor, Dr. Matthew Paproth. The theme for this class was pop culture and technology and we read several books such as Chuck Klosterman’s Sex Drugs and Cocoa Puffs, whose voice I tried to recreate with this work.

In this essay, I chose to delve into the issues of college athletes and the general student population. DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT feel this way. It was just a fun essay to write and the choose your own adventures style really makes it more moving and cynical. This is me as a free spirited unrefined autuer of words aka not very well versed in academia, but it is still one of my favorite essays and a definite launching pad.
So here it is, me at my snarky best >:) copyright 2007

I hate college athletes. No, wait let me rephrase that…I “loathe” college athletes especially football players. Now mind you, I thoroughly enjoy going to Bobby Dodd Stadium and watching a football game or attending a women’s volleyball match at O’Keefe. I also plan on going to basketball and baseball games when those respective seasons come around. But before everyone gets their panties in a twist let me explain why I loathe college athletes. It is hard enough to be a guy in college especially at Tech where the ratio is not necessarily in your favor. Now how is anyone suppose to be noticed when you have these “Adonis’s” walking around campus, strutting their well defined bodies around like they are God’s gift to women. Even though this puts the regular guys, like me, at an extreme disadvantage in the dating scene that is not true reason for my “loathing” of these athletes. It actually has nothing to do with what they look like or how well they play on their respective courts, fields, etc. It is something much deeper than athletic success; most are still oblivious to the privilege they have enjoyed at the expense of others.

Now that you have read the first paragraph you can make one of 2 choices…

Choice A: Don’t read the rest of this paper; just go to the conclusion

Choice B: You have loved reading the first paragraph and want to continue…

Choice B: College football, especially BCS football (Bowl Championship Series aka Division I for those who don’t know), is a humungous cash cow for universities in this country. Even though other male sports take in good revenue but not even close to the scale of football. Many colleges try and bring in the best recruits so that not only can they establish a winning program but the school will love them for all the revenue that they are bringing. Notre Dame received $10 million last year for just getting on a plane and going to the Sugar Bowl game (they got absolutely pummeled by LSU 41-14 so I wouldn’t call it “playing the game”.) $10 million…to get your behind kicked up and down the field, I am pretty sure most universities would take that. The fact that athletes have the potential to make so much money for the universities is the reason why the regular students are screwed. Of course the money made doesn’t necessarily go back to fund the academic institution but often goes towards building and maintaining athletic facilities. Why doesn’t more of that money go towards the general scholarship fund? How in the world is someone who a coach recruits going to get four years free (and possibly a fifth if they get injured) while so many gifted and smart students are coming out of college with large amounts of debt? (The last couple of sentences were just an extraneous thought that I wanted to place somewhere…just something to think about).

College, as everyone is told, is supposed to be the best four years of your life no matter where you decide to go. You will be introduced to tons of people, go to fun events, and become a part of the community. The only thing you have to do in high school is achieve good grades and you will be able to go to any school in the country. Well the first two sentences of that statement are completely true; I realize that already as a freshman. But that last one about getting to go anywhere you want is a tricky one but somehow it always brings me back to the athletes especially football players.

Choice C: you can read the personal accounts, hear more ranting, and continue the paper logically or

Choice D: skip to the actual point I am trying to make or

Choice A: skip to the last paragraph

Choice C: I once had a dream that I would go to the University of Texas-Austin and I felt that I had all the credentials to be admitted. I knew that the admissions process was going to be tough because Texas has a law that mandates that 90% of the students that public universities admit must come from Texas. This doesn’t seem too unreasonable because even though colleges claim to want out-of-state student many use a diffacto form of segregation by not admitting them and Texas just decided to make it a state law. Now first of all, what kind of beep of a law is that? When you really think about that remaining 10% of applicants they are broken down into three areas: out-of-state, international students and what is always comes back to athletes. Every school knows that the best way to expose themselves to the country success in sports is crucial.

Why do I keep harping on the point (as I am sure by now it is getting quite repetitive)…because many of the best athletes that college coaches recruit are from out of state. I really hope I don’t have to spell out what that has to do with this argument but I will say it anyways. Many willing and deserving students are being denied admission to their dream colleges because of the pressures of getting money that colleges face from the government. So far you might think that I am just a sore loser because I didn’t get into my dream school but let me present you a logical argument for why the admissions process is flawed and needs a change. Two of my friends applied to Berkeley: one had a 4.0 GPA the other a 2.5, one was one of the most popular people in schools the other not so much. For the sanity of the person reading this paper I won’t make any more comparisons because it is evident that my friend, he of the 2.5 gpa and one of the most talented athletes in the country got in over my other friend who has always wanted to go to UC Berkeley. I bet you can’t guess who each person I am referring to is 🙂

Choice D: Now that I have ranted and raved about the fact that I think most of the athletes admitted into schools shouldn’t be there, I will digress to what my point actually is. Most people can claim that there is a problem with something and don’t offer a solution but I am not one of them. So, here is the solution that every college should use to not have people complaining about the athletes; they should create a separate admissions process for the athletes! What? I am pretty sure that was your exact thought when you just read that statement, probably with a few expletives mixed in, but let me explain myself. Instead of the athletic community counting as part of the incoming freshman class admission, they should be separated as a different section with the numbers varying on the amount of scholarship available. The “normal” people would apply to the other section and therefore most problems would be solved.

I highly doubt that this system would go over well with any college but hear me out as to why this would be extremely beneficial to any university that would use it. First off this is not an automatic get in free card for any smart student or athlete for that matter. The non-athlete section which would make up national and international students would be held to the same admissions standards that the college had before. The spots that would normally be taken up by athletes would be given to other students who want to come to college to actually come to college, not just to audition for a job in the NFL, NBA, or MLB (all the other sports aren’t that important…except volleyball, the are ok!) The athletes would be admitted under their own section that would comply with the admissions guidelines set by the NCAA, of course. Even though colleges would probably need to build more housing to house the new students that would be admitted along with the athletes but with the money that they are gaining from these bowl games it shouldn’t be a problem.

Even though my plan is quite fool proof (and wonderful I must add) it is not a get into college free card. Just because there are more spots open for students, you might still not get into the college of your dreams. Colleges won’t be relaxing their standards and actually I am pretty sure they will be expecting more from students now that they have more spots. Most good institutions will want to increase the number of bright and talented students and this would be a great way to do this. The purpose of this plan was to give you a better chance to get in, and I did that by creating this plan. I am pretty sure that if these standards were around last year, I would have had a better chance of getting into UT because instead of 10% correlating to 1,000 students and athletes it may have been 1,500 spots open.

Choice A: I realize now that I am about to conclude this essay that I have forgotten all about ranting and have actually tried to create a logical argument, how strange? Anyways, if you have chosen the option to skip the entire paper you missed one hell of an idea that I am not going to repeat. For anyone who stuck through the muck racking and whining I am pretty sure that you were enlightened and are going to run out and petition the leaders of the college to change their minds. I chose to form this paper like some of my favorite books when I was a kid: Choose Your Own Adventure. It makes sense since choosing a college is basically like picking between situations in that book : one might lead you to prosperity the other might lead to something else not good…Oh, and I really don’t feel that way about college athletes; I just wanted a good opening statement so that you would read my paper!